HOA

"A dormant lawn is fine in the winter, but needs to show signs of greening up in the spring. Please water/fertilize the lawn in order to green up the grass. If you would like to replace the lawn with gravel, don't forget to fill out an application to submit for the change. Thanks you."

Dear Home Owners Association,

Our sprinklers broke three months ago. These little letters you are sending do not do anything for my husbands motivation to get them fixed. I found this letter in the trash. How about you come over and kick his ass for me as I have tried everything to get him to fix my lawn? No, I do not want gravel. I want a husband who will either take care of our lawn or fork up the money to get someone out here to fix it.

Sincerely,

Meg Herr